"I look to the future because that's where I'm going to spend the rest of my life."
- George Burns
Re-reading my post from last week the anxiety oozes out and before the 'situation ended' it could only growing. I am incredibly lucky to have friends and family around me who have bailed me out of a tricky situation. My almost empty fridge and freezer refilled and enough money to keep the credit cards and direct debits getting worse. A big weight is lifted. I hate owing people.
Last week I mentioned how uncaring my GP seemed but I wanted to mention how caring and positive my psychologist has been. His attitude has helped ease my anxiety. It is easy to say 'worry about what you can change' but leaving his sessions with that mindset and most recently it has been seize the moment. As such, I've learnt two (kinda 3) chords on a ukuele and I've watched every episode of Star Trek Deep Space Nine, and the original Star Trek Movies.
So what of this future? What is to come? Aside from the new YouTube video?
I have applied for two jobs and got through the initial stages. I'm hoping they are compatible but otherwise I should get at least one. That aside, once I am over this cold/flu which has been hanging over me, probably a side effect from my depression and anxiety, I have a new target in my life. On Friday I received the email confirming that I am a member of UK's Youth Health Parliament. The organisation which is partly funded and organised by Google and Imperial College London. 50 young people from inside and outside the NHS and healthcare system will meet throughout 2016 with a view of making policies and changes to Young People's health. This is an amazing opportunity to make a positive contribution to mental health but also to network and further my career, which in turn can only lead to more contributions. Alongside that, the number of twitter followers and Facebook likes on my page is still growing. That little devil I spoke of last week, the one who endorsed suicide as a final victory, has for now gone to rest.
Long term there could be some questions but today, I prepare for my PIP assessment (SCARY as I desperately need support) and keep working on the drama club's summer shows.
Thank you for all your support and love xx
"It's about the future, Madame Chancellor. Some people think the future means the end of history. Well, we haven't run out of history quite yet. Your father called the future - "the undiscovered country". People can be very frightened of change."
- Captain James T. Kirk, Star Trek VI
Had the 'manager angry at me' nightmare last night. Woke up anxious even though he isn't my boss anymore— Matt Streuli (@mattstreuli) March 8, 2016