Monday, 20 July 2015

Its not about the destination, life is the ride.

In school, in work, in play and in religion we set each ourselves targets and goals. I live rather literally day to day and week to week so my goals are always getting through the next few days and whatever those days may have planned. You might think that means I leave everything until the last minute but it is actually the polar opposite. I try to be over-prepared setting myself little goals along the way and getting the majority of the work done early, so when the day or event does appear I pull my Action plan out the filing and open it up.
Since my post last week I've hit quite a few of those targets and whilst it hasn't always been easy, the end result it that I've enjoyed it. I've had a good week.


Previously in this blog I've pondered what it the meaning of it all and I think I've worked it out. Rather than being 42, the reason for living is the journey or the adventure of life itself. In short, the reaching the goal and its reward is not as good as the journey to get there.

This week I made a status on Facebook. One person described it as shaming but it is only shaming you, if you have a guilty conscious to make you imagine it is about you. It has meant that a friendship has ended but if I am being realistic it ended with this person's betrayal and bitching that kept escalating over the past 8 to 12 months. When you live a few days at a time, some stupid nastiness is easy to ignore. You are still hurt by it, it is still nasty behaviour, but you have bigger anxiety battles to brace yourself for. At some point you decide that you are in a good enough place to confront it or it reaches a limit - and that was this week. Being selfish when you are too caring is tough. Sometimes, you have to be selfish and make sure you are not suffering for those who are truly selfish and do not appreciate it. 
 Selfish persons are incapable of loving others, but they are not capable of loving themselves either. - Erich Fromm

This person will never apologise despite people explaining their friendship sins to them. This person did things for others in the name of friendship and charity but actually they do things only because it offered a benefit to them. "Oh look how good I am"
Any deed done for someone else is a kind one when you don’t expect something in return. - Courtney Olsen
I write this blog as I feel it is therapeutic and I enjoy it - if you enjoy it and it gets a bit more popular each week that is great - but its not why I do it. I like driving for the fun of the drive, not for getting to work. I like running the local drama club because I get to do something quite important for my community and have an epic amount of fun at the same time! - not for the glory of being a panto dame!? I do all these things because I enjoy it - if I get a round of applause or you all nominate me for an OBE (hint) that is just a bonus.

This week I write and ask that you do things because you want to and not because of the rewards. Buy the homeless person a happy meal, not because someone might see but because you think he deserves a meal and you have £1.99 to spare. Stay behind at work not because people will notice (those in charge don't care) but because you want to help your team be ahead tomorrow.

Take a moment to think about this second.

Are you worrying about work tomorrow? Or have you got everything ready for your holiday? What about that birthday card? Or that meeting this week?
Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment. - Buddha

What I am saying links in nicely to mindfulness. I'm not expert and it was only briefly covered in this week's therapy. The idea is to sit still and focus on a the sound around you. Focus on the sound of the clock or the cat licking away at his balls bowl. It is so hard to stop your mind wondering back to the panic and the anxiety of life but maybe if you can take some time out to rest those grey sounds you can some back to reality and face your issues with a more level-headed view; not one driven by emotions.
  

Still not convinced? Below, as always, are my favourite moments from the past week 
where I have loved life and been 'in the moment' enjoying "the ride"
Let me know what you think about living in the moment and enjoying the ride!
 Have I just become some 90's religious pastor? TWEET me and comment below"

I am on holiday to France with my best friends and little sister but there will be lots of fun on my social media! Stay tuned! xx MWAH!! xx






A photo posted by Matthew E Streuli (@matthewstreuli) on


A photo posted by Matthew E Streuli (@matthewstreuli) on

A photo posted by Matthew E Streuli (@matthewstreuli) on


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BRAP